Tag Archives: teenage mutant ninja turtles

Awesome 80’s Run- Done Son!

There truly must be a change in the winds and it’s not just the anticipated arrival of Hurricane Sandy. Not only did I complete the Awesome 80’s 5k Run in a new personal best record of 36:49 (not AS much of a slowpoke as normal), I am also writing yet another blog before the year 2013.
Wow. Blows the mind.

Here are some things I learned from this most recent 5k.
#1.) I (truly) hate running.

I know what you’re thinking. “Star, then WHY in the hell are you doing it?”
Other than wanting to accomplish a “goal” that I have set, I have NO CLUE why I’m doing it?! I see all the others running, delightfully chatting with their running buddies and all I can think about is NOT passing out and falling flat on my face. I even LOOK miserable when I’m running. All I think about is how badly I want it to end so that I can go home and get in bed.

#2.) Some people take the Awesome 80’s Run TOO seriously.

And yes, I’m meaning YOU, the chick that went speeding by in what could have been a bathing suit (at 7:40am in 53 degree weather), as you chucked YOUR own personal, plastic, water bottle into the dirt and grunted grossly. I’m mean, who’s supposed to pick that up for you? Were you going to return to your abandoned water bottle once you blew past all of us fun-trotters? Or is that just YOUR move? You grunt/chuck your water bottle about 500 yards from the finish line in order to show us your dominance? Cause now all I can think about is how that stupid water bottle of yours is just sitting in the cold dirt wondering what it ever did to you.

#3.) It’s totally OK to lose ALL bodily control when running. It’s totally natural for people to run past you farting uncontrollably, burping like Barney from the Simpson’s and blowing snot rockets into the wind so that the lucky bastards around them get to bask in their spray.

With all of that said, there was one piece in the end that I liked. There was a girl quietly standing not far from the finish line with a sign that read, “Don’t think. Just Run.” It was at that moment I realized that THAT very bit of advice not only would have been better at the BEGINNING of the f*%king run, but it was the very thing that kept holding me back. I thought waaaaay too much.

So for any of you other crazy people that might enter any 5k’s, I hope that you might read this and either chuckle or just take the advice I will now keep with me for any future 5k’s I might enter, “Don’t think. Just Run.”

Tootles,
Starbutt

2 Comments